{"id":31619,"date":"2021-03-25T12:03:00","date_gmt":"2021-03-25T16:03:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/philip.greenspun.com\/blog\/?p=31619"},"modified":"2021-03-25T12:08:44","modified_gmt":"2021-03-25T16:08:44","slug":"the-haters-who-said-that-polygamy-would-follow-same-sex-marriage","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/philip.greenspun.com\/blog\/2021\/03\/25\/the-haters-who-said-that-polygamy-would-follow-same-sex-marriage\/","title":{"rendered":"The haters who said that polygamy would follow same-sex marriage"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

Back when same-sex marriage was the subject of referenda (eventually rendered irrelevant by the Supreme Court<\/a>), the haters said that same-sex marriage was the camel nose under the tent for polygamy. This was an outrageous calumny. See “Polygamy Is Not Next”<\/a> (TIME, 2015), for example and “No, Polygamy Isn\u2019t the Next Gay Marriage”<\/a> (Politico, 2015): “Opposing the legalization of plural marriage should not be my burden, because gay marriage and polygamy are opposites, not equivalents.”<\/p>\n\n\n\n

From CNN, six years later: “Three dads, a baby and the legal battle to get their names added to a birth certificate”<\/a>:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"\"<\/a><\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n

This isn’t news, actually, but we’re just hearing about it now…<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The judge ruled in their favor before their daughter Piper was born in 2017<\/strong>. Jenkins believes they are the first polyamorous family in California, and possibly the country, to be named as the legal parents of a child.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n

The journalists want us to know how much better this is than when there are two squabbling opposite-sex parents:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The dads and their children share a bustling house with two Goldendoodles named Otis and Hazel.<\/p>

“We’ve had zero negative feedback from coworkers and friends. Everyone seems to just be delighted about the arrangement and that’s because they know us,” Jenkins says. “I think some people will look at this and say like, ‘Oh, this is exotic. It’s going to harm the child.’ But people who know us know that we have been taking care of these kids as best as we possibly can.”<\/p>

That however hopeless things may seem as a young gay man struggling to fit in, the world is changing. And that he’ll someday find more love under one roof than he ever imagined.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n

(If two dads are good, maybe three are better! See The happiest children in Spain live with two daddies<\/a>,)<\/p>\n\n\n\n

From my inbox, “How Polyamorists and Polygamists Are Challenging Family Norms”<\/a> (New Yorker<\/em>): “Campaigns for legal recognition may soon make multiple-partner marriages as unremarkable as same-sex marriages.<\/strong>“<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"\"<\/a><\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n

Some excerpts:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The next year, in an online forum, they saw a post from a woman in her early thirties named Julie Halcomb that said, \u201cI\u2019m a single mom, I\u2019ve got a two-year-old daughter, and I\u2019d like to learn more.\u201d Rich wrote, \u201cIf you want to know more, ask my wives.\u201d Angela had opposed adding a third wife, but when she got off her first call with Julie she said, \u201cO.K., when is she moving in?\u201d Julie visited, mostly to make sure that the kids would get along, and joined the household permanently a week later.<\/p>

Their living arrangements attracted other unwelcome attention. Neighbors called the police, and Child Protective Services interviewed the children. Since there was only one marriage certificate, the police couldn\u2019t file bigamy charges. \u201cThey said, \u2018We don\u2019t like it, but there\u2019s nothing we can do,\u2019 \u201d Julie recalled. \u201cBut we had them at our door constantly. One of the kids would have an accident at school\u2014we\u2019d have them there again. They were constantly trying to find signs of abuse.\u201d<\/p>

At the family\u2019s largest, Rich had four wives, but when I met him, a couple of years ago, he and Angela were divorcing, and another woman, April, had come and gone. Rich, Brandy, and Julie were living with their kids\u2014six, including Rich\u2019s and Julie\u2019s from earlier relationships\u2014and saw Angela\u2019s two every other weekend.<\/p>

The Austins would like one day to enjoy the legal benefits that married couples take for granted. Brandy and Julie take heart from the success of the gay-marriage movement. \u201cI\u2019ve got a wedding invitation on the way from a friend who\u2019s transitioning from female to male,\u201d Julie said. \u201cI\u2019ve got classmates that came out almost twenty years ago. They\u2019ve been lucky enough to get married. I wish people would be as accepting with us as we try to be of everyone else.\u201d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n

We already have functional polygamy in the U.S. An American doesn’t need to settle for the highest-earning partner whom he\/she\/ze\/they can find for a long-term marriage. He\/she\/ze\/they can have sex once with an already-married high-income defendant and earn more via child support (see Hunter Biden’s plaintiff<\/a>) than by getting married to a mediocre earner and enduring his\/her\/zer\/their presence in the apartment 24\/7. Soon we can have de jure<\/em> polygamy?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Back when same-sex marriage was the subject of referenda (eventually rendered irrelevant by the Supreme Court), the haters said that same-sex marriage was the camel nose under the […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[30,34,39,24],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-31619","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-divorce-child-support-custody-family-law","category-gender-studies","category-sex","category-social-justice"],"yoast_head":"\nThe haters who said that polygamy would follow same-sex marriage - Philip Greenspun\u2019s Weblog<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/philip.greenspun.com\/blog\/2021\/03\/25\/the-haters-who-said-that-polygamy-would-follow-same-sex-marriage\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"The haters who said that polygamy would follow same-sex marriage - 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