Modest proposal for the Google all-hands meeting

“Google cancels all-hands diversity meeting over safety concerns: Google feared questioners would face threats if their names leaked online.” (ArsTechnica) is disappointing to any Lisp or SQL programmer because it was a missed opportunity to use the headline “Group of C programmers say that they feel unsafe.”

Apparently the issue is that adherents can’t anonymously suggest or vote on questions for the high priests. If done with Google’s existing discussion infrastructure, real employee names are attached to postings.

What if Google told everyone who wanted to participate in this process to sign up to AOL and get a username such as “SupportDiversity2017”? Then they could use AOL’s infrastructure to gather questions, vote questions up/down, etc.


5 thoughts on “Modest proposal for the Google all-hands meeting

  1. Pretty sure this year at Goog, the Android teams would feel unsafe when the Golang teams found out they were still using Java. The language is the computer.

  2. It’s not Java! Any resemblance is due to prejudiced compilation by entitled male developers.

  3. Actually, C is out at Google. C+= is the new feminist computer language of choice that eliminates patriarchal heteronormative male privilege from the coding process.

    For instance, in C+=, instead of “running” a program, which implies thin privilege and pressure to “work out”, programs are “given birth”. After birth, a program rolls for a 40% chance of executing literally as the code is written, 40% of being “psychoanalytically incompatible”, and 40% of executing by a metaphorical epistemology the order of the functions found in main().

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