Summer weddings should be in waterslide parks

Thus far this summer I’ve endured two weddings.  One was at a golf course by the sea and the other in a fancy hotel in Harvard Square.  Both seem like cruel wastes of a day.  It is so painful to sit indoors and look out the window and think “we could be out there moving around, having fun, enjoying the warm weather.”  The feeling is especially acute if one has driven a long distance to attend the wedding.

Imagine instead a wedding held at a waterslide park.  The ceremony would be at the top of one of the big waterslides and people would leave the aisles by jumping into the tubes.  Instead of warmed-over surf and turf guests could wander around getting freshly grilled hot dogs from the usual theme park vendors.  Rather than having to buy expensive and ugly bridesmaid dresses the guests need only show up in a swimsuit.  Most important everyone would remember that they left the house and had a lot of fun.

Most weddings seem to cost at least $200 per guest and therefore the cost of renting out a smaller and/or older theme park should not be prohibitive.

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