I was down in Bethesda, Maryland over the weekend, technically home to Georgetown Prep (actually located, since 1919, in what we Native Bethesdans would have called “Rockville”) and its weekly official gang rape parties (organized by Brett Kavanaugh, according to Julie Swetnick). None of these parties were on the calendar for Saturday night at my parents’ retirement fortress, so we were able to enjoy a quiet family dinner (cooked and served by immigrants to the pro-immigration elderly Democrats (nearly all had retired from careers, e.g., civil service, medicine, or law, that depended on Big Government becoming Yet Bigger)).
A grandson who is a local high school junior joined. I asked “Are you partying like a Kavanaugh?”
I’m hoping that this can become a new meme to replace “Party like a Rock Star”.
[I posted this on Facebook. It was #NotFunny and #TooSoon. A woman who manages an anti-development non-profit org:
Really? You mean like, get drunk, assault women, black out, and don’t remember a thing the next day. You seriously think that’s funny?
to which I responded
All the more reason to ask!
A self-employed carpenter and contractor whom I know commented
I only hope he turns out that smart. Remember also “he, who is without sin, cast the first stone”
He’s 70 years old and, for 55 years, has been getting up at 5 am every morning, 6 days per week, to work. It is possible that he interpreted my post literally as he is not a close friend nor a close reader. A woman who went to an elite high school then two elite universities before settling into a cushy university desk job, resonded to him and men in general:
It sounds like you may have things on your conscience. That’s ok, we are not judging you (at least not until you run for a public office). Let me give you this advice. Just come clean and apologize. You will be forgiven.
If Jesus were alive today, he would be a liberal!
I can see the aggrieved male privilege getting up at arms about “politically correct” taking away the last bits of “boys will be boys” fun you were able to have (at our expense too!). Please pardon me if my heart is not breaking for you. I cannot feel guilty or bad that it is no longer ok to drink until you are liberated enough to force yourself on another human being. Please figure out how to bond with other guys and have fun some other way.
Is it reasonable for a woman with an elaborate list of educational credentials and a highly paid desk job that starts at 10:00 am (or later!) to say that a man who gets up at 0500 to work with his hands has “privilege” compared to her? (They both appear to be white, but their respective photos have not been evaluated by official government race-identifiers.) Could billionaire Sheryl Sandberg, for example, say that her immigrant landscapers are “privileged” if they happen to identify as male? If not, where is the line over which a female can cross into the land of “more privileged than a blue-collar guy”?]
For the record, though I was a high school student in Bethesda in the late 1970s, right in the middle of the Jimmy Carter Malaise and a core non-woke period of “rape culture”, I did not hear about any rapes at parties or otherwise (maybe Walt Whitman (public) High School kids were not cool enough for these?). Teenagers back then were terrible gossips and keeping secrets was more or less impossible. The most common sex-related scandal was a pregnancy (this, despite the extensive contraception education provided by Montgomery County officialdom). A few Catholic girls got married as a result of unintended pregnancies. The happy new couple would move into a walk-out basement belonging to one set of parents (our neighborhood was called “Mohican Hills” (maybe Elizabeth Warren lives there now?) and nearly all of the houses were on a slope). The new moms would take a couple of months off school and then hand the resulting baby to their 40-something parents. At the time, a 17-year-old giving birth was considered unfortunate. This was before the advent of child support guidelines (history) that made single motherhood a financially sensible lifestyle choice and every pregnant girl either married the father or had an abortion (legal since 1968 in Maryland).
(Teenage motherhood still seems to be something for people to condemn. I spoke with an anesthesiologist the other day. She remarked negatively on having recently assisted with a birth at which four generations were present: baby, mother, grandmother, and great-grandmother. “The oldest family member in the room was 39. Nobody had a male partner or a job.” (i.e., each child had been born to a 13-year-old mom) In her view, this fecundity was due to our welfare system. “What this country needs is more hunger. You don’t see people in China having babies so that they can then live in public housing.” She’s a frequent business traveler to China so this is based on first-hand knowledge. I was shocked by her statements because typical Boston-area academic physicians are just as liberal as you’d expect given that more than 50 percent of their income comes from the government (Medicare, Medicaid, etc.). It is odd that Americans want to condemn something that they also vote to fund and enable!)
Update: “Kavanaugh Was Questioned by Police After Bar Fight in 1985” (nytimes), which says “As an undergraduate student at Yale, Brett M. Kavanaugh was involved in an altercation at a local bar during which he was accused of throwing ice on another patron, according to a police report.” Compare to students in the 18th century (Daily Mail): “duelling with swords; getting loudly and raucously drunk and getting kicked out of taverns … Trapping a servant girl in their rooms and scaring her; … Getting drunk and arguing with a lecturer…”
Related:
- “How Anti-Poverty Programs Marginalize Fathers” (Atlantic) explains why today’s 17-year-old mom might not want to marry the dad: “Cohabitating with a boyfriend who is not biologically related to any of the household’s children is the most advantageous setup in most states.”
you have many weird friend, Phil!
toucan sam: I think they are fairly typical coastal-dwelling graduates of fancy colleges (a lot easier to get into back in the old days!). Maybe there is some selection bias in that the ones who are most passionate about Trump hatred are the ones who tend to post more.
Is it reasonable for a woman with an elaborate list of educational credentials and a highly paid desk job that starts at 10:00 am (or later!) to say that a man who gets up at 0500 to work with his hands has “privilege” compared to her?
Men generally never worry about avoiding sexual assault. Women have to think about such things quite a bit. It’s a privilege. Clearly what time individuals start their work day is irrelevant to that. Also, does this woman post on Facebook the face that she goes into the office at “10:00 am (or later!)”? It doesn’t seem plausible.
For the record, though I was a high school student in Bethesda in the late 1970s, right in the middle of the Jimmy Carter Malaise and a core non-woke period of “rape culture”, I did not hear about any rapes at parties or otherwise (maybe Walt Whitman (public) High School kids were not cool enough for these?).
Maybe you should do a little research at the local police department. It sounds unlikely that zero girls would have been raped in Bethesda during the 1970s. Consider the possibility that they didn’t go into school the next day and discuss in the cafeteria at lunch time.
It is odd that Americans want to condemn something that they also vote to fund and enable!)
Was there some sort of state referendum on the ballot that allowed Massachusetts residents to vote for more hunger?
> You don’t see people in China having babies so that they can then live in public housing.”
However socialist Chinese are travelling to capitalist America to have babies, presumably for the social benefits the children will receive (google: “birth tourism”). What a country!
I guess it’s too late for “Party like a Kennedy!” or “Party like a Clinton!”.
Vince:
> Men generally never worry about avoiding sexual assault.
> Women have to think about such things quite a bit. It’s a privilege.
That any person has to worry about sexual assault is a terrible thing. Thank goodness we live in a society that will punish people who commit sexual assault.
In high school, a friend confided in me that her decision to claim she was raped started as a way to avoid paying $20 for plan-B after a condom broke. It got awkward when the counselor wanted her to talk to the cops. She made up a story they didn’t question. She was proud of her idea to say the perpetrator was black, because that didn’t match anyone she knew. So, no harm would come to anyone she cared about.
In two decades of working on corporate America, I have seen three women accuse men of sexual harassment. I know for a fact that two of those cases were deliberate premeditated lies. In one, the accused was with me at the time of the alleged touching, in a different state. In the other, a coworker turned over emails from the “victim” bragging about her plan to fib and get promoted. The third incident seems unlikely to be real, but I do not have proof.
Women have the ability to ruin any man’s life by telling a lie. That is more than a privilege: It is a power no human should have. It is evil, and it has to be stopped.
Maybe tell the woman who insulted your working class friend this…. Hey cutie! Don’t get your panties in a bunch.
> Men generally never worry about avoiding sexual assault.
> Women have to think about such things quite a bit. It’s a privilege.
Even after 14+ years in the US, it’s stunning to see such terminology used in such a context. Privilege? Let’s check out another male privilege – have a look at the homicide statistics by gender. And yes, women, especially in some countries, do have to avoid many places when the sun sets (not even at night), walk while checking how likely a male near them might be dangerous – by which I mean how likely he is to jump on her, drag her into a basement and rape, not how likely he is to invite her to voluntarily come to a party with drugs, alcohol, multiple strangers etc. The stories I’ve heard in this country consistently involve young women who voluntarily went to a party where they intended to get drunk fully knowing potential consequences because they have already done the same thing multiple times and saw no problem with that at the time. None.
By the way, to clarify in case it wasn’t clear enough: when I say ” they have already done the same thing multiple times and saw no problem with that at the time”, I mean that they went there, got drunk, had sex with strangers/somebody they knew but weren’t “interested in” before. Not that they got drunk etc before and “nothing happened” but this time, oh what a surprise…
Did the anesthesiologist happen to mention the race of the 4-under-40 family?
Accusing a woman of lying about an attempted rape that actually happened is not as bad as the rape itself, but it certainly meets the definition of evil.
@zzazz
Fair enough – how do you feel about a woman accusing a man of rape that never actually happened?
@Vince
“Men generally never worry about avoiding sexual assault. Women have to think about such things quite a bit. It’s a privilege.”
“As a man” (I hate using that phrase) who is 6’0″ and 200lbs, I generally do not have to worry about sexual violence.
But I do have to worry about scam artist women blackmailing me, and girlfriends getting pregnant on purpose, both of which have happened.
( https://www.craigslist.org/about/best/sea/274495936.html?lang=en&cc=us)
“The media” (another phrase I hate) is spinning this ridiculous story that no woman would ever lie, so we must always believe them no questions asked. Furthermore no woman would ever do anything evil, so when it appears like they have, really it was just some man who lured her into it.
And, of course, all of these problems would disappear if we only destroyed the patriarchy.
ScarletNumber: “Did the anesthesiologist happen to mention the race of the 4-under-40 family?”
Of course not! That would have made her a full-scale Deplorable. For my part, I recently met a woman roughly my age who had brought her 9-year-old great-granddaugher to the https://www.3countyfair.com/ (right next to the Northampton Airport if you want to fly in and walk there next year). For this to happen, the respective moms would have needed to be 15 years old. She had been born in Puerto Rico and moved to New York and then to Holyoke, Massachusetts.
zzazz: “an attempted rape that actually happened” is a problematic phrase. Based on what I’ve read, today’s young folks tend to be drunk during their party evenings (at least those that lead to sex and/or litigation/recriminations). Thus a typical fundamental problem is that nobody knows what “actually happened” (if two drunk young people are in a private room they may recall the events differently). See http://philip.greenspun.com/blog/2015/05/13/missoula-rape-and-the-justice-system-in-a-college-town-a-k-a-majoring-in-partying-and-football/ and http://philip.greenspun.com/blog/2017/12/04/why-college-students-need-to-be-drunk-before-having-sex/ for example.
Corindal:
Women have the ability to ruin any man’s life by telling a lie. That is more than a privilege: It is a power no human should have. It is evil, and it has to be stopped.
You’re overstating the scope of the problem. A large portion of all women work in small businesses where is HR department to complain to. Many others who are harassed don’t report the harassment because harasser has a position senior to theirs in the hierarchy of the organization.
Galya:
> Men generally never worry about avoiding sexual assault.
> Women have to think about such things quite a bit. It’s a privilege.
Even after 14+ years in the US, it’s stunning to see such terminology used in such a context. Privilege? Let’s check out another male privilege – have a look at the homicide statistics by gender. And yes, women, especially in some countries, do have to avoid many places when the sun sets (not even at night), walk while checking how likely a male near them might be dangerous – by which I mean how likely he is to jump on her, drag her into a basement and rape, not how likely he is to invite her to voluntarily come to a party with drugs, alcohol, multiple strangers etc.
It’s unclear what your criticism is of my point. If I can walk three miles after dark to go see a movie and then walk home after Midnight without worrying much about being attacked and women wouldn’t do the same due to fear, that’s awfully fortunate for me. It’s a situation that I benefit from due to my gender. Perhaps privilege is not the exact correct word to use, but that’s quibbling. Regarding your question ” how likely he is to jump on her, drag her into a basement…” it doesn’t matter how likely it is. The question is irrelevant.
Vince: As of 2017, “More Americans Work At Big Firms Than Small Ones”
https://www.nysscpa.org/news/publications/the-trusted-professional/article/more-americans-work-at-big-firms-than-small-ones-040717
Why does a person (regardless of gender ID) who is being assaulted at work need an HR Department? Sexual assault is a crime and the U.S. runs the world’s largest prison system (as a percentage of population) and world’s most expensive system for prosecuting criminals. A U.S. resident who believes that he/she/it/they has been raped or assaulted at work can simply dial 911, no?
I was commenting on Corindal’s statement, which was about sexual harassment, not assault. The question should be posed to him about why he introduced that topic.
Vince: I guess the academics treat these as related (see, for example, https://pdfs.semanticscholar.org/17cc/8c39e26663d16f7e7e9a2187be34e636a667.pdf for “Factitious Sexual Harassment” that also talks about factitious rape allegations). So maybe it is legitimate for Corindal to relate them as well.
“What this country needs is more hunger. You don’t see people in China having babies so that they can then live in public housing.”
Yes, because that works miracles in sub-saharan Africa!
Francisco: See also https://www.forbes.com/sites/johngoodman/2015/03/31/singapore-a-fascinating-alternative-to-the-welfare-state/#5651003a76c0
“Singapore has done something even more remarkable than its economic accomplishments. It has built an alternative to the European style welfare state. Think of all the reasons why people turn to government in other developed countries: retirement income, housing, education, medical care etc. In Singapore people are required to save to take care of these needs themselves.”
(Of course, this is not to say that Americans would be able to take care of themselves without the Great Father in Washington. Folks in Singapore, on average, may have a greater inherent motivation to work. See http://philip.greenspun.com/blog/2015/01/15/son-also-rises/ for how this may be inherited/genetic.)
Seems like your facebook friends are actually crazy. Just checked this thread again on facebook and oh my…… they are calling Phil horrible things. I think maybe you need to delete some facebook friends!
toucan sam: I don’t need to de-friend them. All of the virtuous are gradually defriending me!
The fact that you didn’t hear about something doesn’t mean much besides you weren’t invited to the cool parties. I wasn’t either (I was stuck somewhere between jock and nerd and never fit in to either very well), but I did hear about a party where a gang rape was alleged to have happened to a friend of mine. Think about it. Who was going to say anything to their parents? Certainly not me (as it was 3rd hand and my parents didn’t have the word sex in their vocabulary). And certainly not the girl, who was likely very drunk. Or the boys who were some combination of drunk on beer/weed, and drunk on their luck. Heard another story about a kid on the football team who was forced to masturbate to a porno mag while at football camp. Given my social status at the time, I’m guessing there were lots more I didn’t hear about. (BTW I spent 3 summers working in DC In the mid-late-70s and I know first hand there were plenty of Whitman girls who “put out”. Whether they were raped or assaulted I don’t know, as that never came up in conversation.)