As our young football fans clean up the house for tomorrow’s guests and prepare the chip bowls, I wonder if Bad Bunny will sing his big hit “Monaco” tomorrow at the Super Bowl. That should start some conversations at American elementary schools. Sample lyrics:
You don’t know what it’s like to be out at high sea with two hundred hoes
To have the flight attendant suck you off in the sky
What it’s like to throw five hundred thousand at the strip club
That’s why I don’t care about your opinion
That’s why you’re 101 in the top 100, and I’m first
You’re not rappers anymore, now you’re podcasters
My barber charges more than you
Fucking and traveling around the worldWhen I die, I’m gonna leave a hundred plots of land to my grandchildren
To all my ladies, the butts and the breast
And an F-40 for my haters but without brakes
Why? So they crash
He, so they kill themselves
Red or white, matt black, what you want?
Rest in peace, I’m still on the yachtI light a phillie, the family is in Monaco
ChatGPT:
It’s not meant to be taken literally; he’s not claiming there are exactly 200 women on the yacht. Instead, it’s an exaggerated fantasy of abundance — so rich, so famous, so untouchable that he could fill a boat with models just for fun.
The phrase “I light a Phillie” (sometimes written “light up a Phillie”) comes from slang referring to lighting a Phillie Blunt, which is a cigar brand (“Phillies”) that’s often used to roll and smoke marijuana.
[Regarding the flight attendant line] That lyric describes conduct that would violate multiple aviation rules and laws. Interference with flight crew (14 CFR §91.11): Anything that distracts or interferes with a crewmember’s duties is prohibited. Engaging a flight attendant in sexual activity would clearly qualify. … Consent & power dynamics: Any sexual activity involving a working crewmember raises serious legal issues, including coercion and workplace sexual misconduct. … Sexual acts in public conveyances: Aircraft are considered public spaces under U.S. law. Sexual activity onboard can constitute indecent exposure or lewd conduct, which is prosecutable.
[The AI seems to be confused regarding the fact that a private jet can have, and in some cases require, flight attendant, e.g., when certified for more than 19 passenger seats.]
Related:
- Tom Brady goes to Heaven (featuring lyrics from Kendrick Lamar, the 2025 Super Bowl performer)
- Why isn’t the Super Bowl always in a tax-free state? (this year it will be the opposite and maybe Bad Bunny will get hit with California taxes? Separately, why does the San Francisco Bay Area want to host a Covid superspreader event such as the Super Bowl? Perhaps 200,000 people will gather for this event if we include hotels, restaurants, bars, etc. See New York Times article, below.)
- “Mask mandates return in parts of the Bay Area as virus season nears” (October 7, 2025; Santa Clara County, where the Super Bowl will happen, is on the list of the Science-following places where masks are required)
“I don’t know who he is. I don’t know why they’re doing it’s, like, crazy. I think it’s absolutely ridiculous.” — Trump on Bad Bunny at the Superbowl [TM]
I didn’t know who this guy was either. Thanks for informing us Phil, um, I guess. A party on Mr. Bunny’s yacht is most likely a super-spreader event, of venereal disease. I don’t envy his lifestyle, his coke, his blunts, his stank hoes, or his polyester fur pimp coat.
Wikipedia tells us:
> Vanessa Rosales of CNN has opined that “in pink, florals and short shorts, Bad Bunny champions a new masculinity”
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bad_Bunny
I’ll stick to the old masculinity, thanks. Even Greta Thunberg is a better role model for the young’uns than this “bolsa de ducha”. He brags about inventing flow, but his music is dull and awkward. I like Jay-Z much more than this Puerto Rican, Juanito-come-lately knockoff. At least you could dance to “99 Problems (but a bitch ain’t one)” and receive a valuable warning against putting women on a pedestal. His “hit” Monaco is wack, yo. In it, BB makes death threats to his enemies (aren’t these people protesting violence with their opposition to ICE?)–I doubt anyone cares enough about him to consider him an enemy. Yawn.
I’m protesting Superbowl [TM] LX. “¡Conejito malo, fuera!” Some of us Muricans are fluent in Spanish, esse.
@H8A
Now, now…I think it’s better to focus on the positive. I guess they didn’t invite Luis Fonsi, another artist from Puerto Rico because he isn’t as current or maybe as controversial. Despacito (Slowly) is a cool song, with some hot women in the video for those young enough to risk their heart racing:
Oh!
You, you are the magnet and I’m the metal
I’m getting closer and forming a plan
Just thinking about it accelerates my pulse (Oh, yeah!)
Now, I’m already liking it more than usual
All of my senses are asking for more
We must take this slowly
The lyrical nature of Spanish, a romance language, really comes out in this tune. This dude is much more normal with his “machismo”, and it doesn’t look like he is trying to compensate for something. He could probably do a kick ass performance at the Superbowl, minus the politics and posturing. (No one asked me for my opinion, unfortunately.) Apparently, he is a better role model because he has been an ambassador for St. Jude’s Children’s hospital. He has a goal of spreading Latin culture, and doesn’t seem to be sabotaging those efforts, unlike Mr. Bunny.
Have a nice weekend everybody. This should make even white guys dance a little in their chair:
I ended up catching up on some coding instead of watching the game yesterday. While doing that, I did listen to some Latin music, the classical guitar of Agustín Barrios and Andrés Segovia, followed by Philip Glass’ Solo Piano.
Progressives can have the Super Bowl. It’s really just a violent gladiator contest, war abstracted. The teams are owned by rich people who hire others, often people of color, to absorb the concussive injuries. Why do people have such fierce loyalty to local teams? Residual tribalism? My idea of the “new masculinity” and being “cool” is quite different from Bad Bunny and friends.
I lost 8 IQ points just reading those “lyrics”
We are on a trajectory outlined in movie Idiotocracy.
Wow, so difficult to beat Bad Bunny and his hatred of America and Western Civilization…Bravo Bad Bunny. Despicable that the scum of Kid Rock and his friends celebrated America in a competing half-time concert!
Whether it is Bad Bunny or someone else, what is it with performers these days constantly grabbing their crotch? Is it so loose that it might fall off while they are dancing? During the Super Bowl, it wasn’t just Bad Bunny doing it, other male dancers were as well. And while we are at it, what about the female dancers constantly shaking their inject Sculptra butt in a suggestive way?
Call me old-fashioned, but I would much rather see smoking back on TV than these acts. Smoking may kill your lungs and shorten your life, but this kind of acts harms and kills your brain.
Not just “these days”. Hip hop guys have been at it since the 90s. It’s really gross. Some cultural thing about drawing the ladies attention to their junk, or something. I wouldn’t know. His halftime rival once sang:
I got no game, I can′t reward ya
But if you wanna long one baby
I got one for ya
Don’t wanna hear me cuss, don’t wanna hear me brag
So I′m grabbing on my thingy while I let my pants sag
— Kid Rock, I Got One For Ya, 1998
More hip-hop cargo-culting by Mr. Bunny. To be fair, I also stopped watching MLB years ago because of all the crotch adjusting and spitting. The football patting on the butt thing is similar. I prefer to watch all female ballet dancers or women’s soccer, sans butt implants and not smoking cigarettes.
“¡Conejito malo, fuera!”