Informal sperm donor

From the New York Post: “Professor who donates sperm in city bathrooms has sired 22 kids.”

Some excerpts:

The 6-foot-2 CUNY Kingsborough math professor [Ari Nagel] has served as a sperm donor for dozens of locals, siring 22 kids over the past 12 years with 18 women of various backgrounds.

He will also offer his services in his home near Downtown Brooklyn, but mama wannabes are often more comfortable meeting in public.

Once a location is chosen, Nagel will go into the bathroom, pleasure himself while watching porn on his iPhone — “You can’t connect to Target Wi-Fi if you’re connecting to a porn site, so I use my cell service,” he says — and ejaculate into an Instead Softcup, a type of menstrual cup.

He then delivers the specimen to the woman, who goes into the ladies’ restroom and inserts it into her cervix.

Without the explicit legal protections afforded to sperm banks, what about post-conception litigation?

The first five women he worked with successfully sued him for child support, and nearly half of his paycheck is garnished for his offspring.

“I don’t know what’s more surprising: that five sued or that 17 didn’t,” Nagel says. “They were all well aware there was no financial obligation on my part. They all promise in advance they won’t sue.”

(Under New York family law, he actually should have lost close to 100 percent of his paycheck to the five plaintiffs. Assuming one child per mother, the first plaintiff would receive 17 percent of his pre-tax income, the second woman to sue would get 17 percent of the 83 percent remainder, etc. Due to the fact that child support is not deductible from income, Professor Nagel would quickly get to the poverty line from a combination of child support orders and federal, state, and city income taxes. Assuming that he starts with $100,000 per year, the first plaintiff gets $17,000 per year, the second $14,110, the third $11,711, and the fourth just $9,720 per year. The professor is now left with $47,458 of pre-tax income but close to $40,000 of that would go to pay taxes. The fifth plaintiff ought to get $8,068 but in theory the system is not supposed to reduce a defendant below the poverty line. Note that it may not be accidental that the first five women sued. Due to the difference in cash values assigned to children under New York law, the sixth and later women don’t have a claim worth pursuing against Professor Nagel. So it would be more accurate to say that 100 percent of the people who could have sued him and gotten something actually did sue.)

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10 thoughts on “Informal sperm donor

  1. Love to see actual photos of all involved. Some real beauty, I’d wager. (Tongue firmly planted in cheek.)
    What self respecting woman would impregnate themselves in a Target restroom stall??

  2. The 1 Google result paints an interesting picture of the sperm donation world. Artificial insemination through a sperm bank is over $40,000 & there’s no protection from child support. The main advantage is screening provided by the sperm bank & some anonymity which the parents can still defeat by DNA testing.

    Most men aren’t genetically perfect enough to donate. Someone willing to put up merely with a lactose intolerant kid who is perfect in every other way can do a lot better financially in the Target bathroom. Most donors are college students in Silicon Valley. Male engineers planning to reproduce by sperm donation are too old to donate to a sperm bank by the time they realize they’re not going to encounter any women.

  3. In my late 20s, I made three deposits to a sperm bank for the purpose of reserving my sperm for my own future needs. The fee to store the sperm was about $300 per year, which I paid for a few years. After a series of relocations, the sperm bank didn’t have a valid address for me and stopped billing me, and a stopped paying the annual fee. That was almost 25 years ago, so I guess my deposits have been destroyed.

    Oh, and I ended up dating the front desk clerk at the sperm bank for a while.

  4. @jack crossfire

    The primary benefit for a man to donate via a sperm bank is the protection from child support. If that wasn’t there, sperm banks would cease to exist.

    @Billg

    Some of the “donations” were the old-fashioned way.

  5. The public nature of his activity, and looking at the pictures of many of his partners, leads me to believe that the Professor has a couple of fetishes.

  6. @ Hugh G. Rekshun #3: don’t be so sure that your sperm was destroyed once you stopped paying the yearly storage bill… finders-keepers. You could have a mixed gender soccer team number of progenies just waiting to meet bio-daddy AND their half siblings. Why don’t you look into it & advertise in the bank’s newsletter or social media along the lines of “Am I your daddy? If you were conceived through Acme’s Sperm Bank in the 90s, then you could be my child,” or something (I’ve read that DNA paternity tests are nowadays like $100 in the USA). There’s also at least one full length documentary film about a (now deceased) American fertility clinic doctor who surreptitiously sired upwards of 100 kids in the 60-70s, and the filmmaker’s quest to discover his other half-siblings… quite moving really, although very few agreed to appear visibly on camera.

    PS. Ari Nagel is obviously crazy on some level, because his (one has to assume conscious and sober) wish to sow his tame oats in controlled Target millieus is not among what we could call human common denominator traits. Besides being directly detrimental to his financial health, it sounds not a little as a perverted altruistic(?) obsession. Quite reminiscent of some millionaire (written up in Vanity Fair? maybe 8 years ago), whose altruistic mania made him attempt to donate a kidney to a stranger, which in turn led his wife to stop that in court (as I’m not in the habit of obsessing over others’ obsessions,I don’t remember how it ended though).

    ObFilmRef: “The Kids Are All Right” by Lisa Cholodenko, 2010, with Julianne Moore, Annette Bening, Mark Ruffalo – about a teenager’s quest for her sperm donor dad (and lesbian angst besides).

  7. Not to be flippant or anything, but I see a great potential in hitherto unexploited concept for a board- or computer game along the lines of “Informal Sperm Donor For A Day;” think “Leisure Larry/ Longue Lizard” type of entertainment, where participants chose which characters to play, draw task lists, and then attempt to outwit one another in various casual sperm-donorsy ways, including not knowing in advance if, say, their child support claim will fall within or outside the maximum envelope for such. Could even be a variant of Monopoly, then with streetwalkers thrown in to spice up the pick-up lines. Whoever sires most progeny at the lowest relative cost (in damages and lawyers’ fees) “wins.” Here, take and develop it, you could even market it as a educational type of game to local PTA bodies.

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