Working January 6 into every conversation

One way to come across as more elite, like the folks who own and edit the New York Times, is to work January 6 into every conversation. Top of front page of NYT, 11/8, for example, a “breaking” story:

I’ve been practicing this. A colleague on a project asked me to do something urgently. My response:

I will try later. Dealing with an insurrection by the 6- and 8-year-olds that makes Jan 6 look like a church picnic.

How else can January 6 be used in everyday conversations? Here are some ideas…

In a store:

Wow! The prices are up 20 percent compared to when I was here during the January 6 insurrection.

(notice how this communicates to the listener that the speaker is not a Deplorable who traveled to Washington, D.C. on January 6; don’t use this if you’re in a store in Washington, D.C.!)

If someone expresses unhappiness at being ordered by Professor Dr. Joe Biden, M.D., Ph.D. to get vaccinated/boosted by January 4 with the latest concoctions of the pharma industry:

If you get your last shot on January 4, you’ll have January 6 as a paid day off for vaccine recovery and poignant reflection on the one-year anniversary of the day that the insurrectionists nearly toppled the U.S. government

If your golden retriever is pulling on the leash and refusing to abandon a tree:

She hates squirrels more than the armed January 6 insurrectionists hate democracy.

Readers: Now it is all up to you!

Hunting squirrels from inside the minivan:

Video! (sorry that it is vertical, but trees are vertical)

9 thoughts on “Working January 6 into every conversation

  1. “As a January 6th survivor, I feel compelled to point out that the attack on the capitol has greater historical significance than the Storming of the Bastille .”

    The ambiguity will leave them wondering if I am one of them or a Deplorable.

    • Anonymous: Thank you for this contribution and for pointing out that more than 330 million of us here in the U.S. are “January 6th survivors”.

      So many ways to use this one.

      (in response to a household member asking about setting a kitchen timer) “As a January 6th survivor, I know the consequences of failure to follow established rules and procedures, which is why I always cook Barilla Campanelle for 10-11 minutes.”

  2. I am convinced that the events of January 6th not only caused my recent Very Serious Health Condition but weakened our health care system to such an extent due to the.shocking official mismanagement at every level that my disease progressed to the life-threatening state I found myself facing.

    All of that changed for the better when the Insurrectionists were finally held to account and the new Administration was empowered to end this horrible plague.

  3. Yes, I have observed this canine behavior before. I can only conclude that just as dogs only see black and white and not color, they only see millimeters and not feet, so for the dog, the squirrel appears to be inches above its nose.

  4. Phil, your blog follows a similar pattern where you weave certain topics repeatedly into your posts, Your latest seams to be how wonderful Florida is over Massachusetts. You toss out a few Florida negatives to be “fair & balanced” but you come across sounding at times like some form of “elite” for making the wise choice of moving to Florida compared to us ignorant deplorables that choose to remain in MA.

Comments are closed.