I need some English lessons

“Mustard’s Ex-Wife Demands Over $80k Per Month In Child Support” (HipHopDX) has me wondering if the English language has moved on without me.

The article starts off simple:

DJ Mustard’s ex-wife has reportedly demanded the producer pay her over $80,000 a month in child support. … Chanel Thierry filed an order to a California judge on issues of child support, custody, spousal support, attorney’s fees, … he and Chanel Thierry had signed a prenuptial agreement prior to their 2020 wedding.

In other words, a Californian hopes to bank roughly $1 million/year tax-free in child support (straightforward under California family law), a claim that wouldn’t be impaired by a prenuptial agreement barring alimony, property division, etc.

Where it gets confusing are the public Instagram posts from the mom.

How is it possible to fit three children and an adult driver into a Lamborghini? I haven’t even been able to get myself into one. Maybe she means the absurd Lamborghini SUV?

What does “My Legs Move For The Bag” mean?

11 thoughts on “I need some English lessons

  1. > What does “My Legs Move For The Bag” mean?

    I wouldn’t know either (though Anonymous has it right no doubt). We’re in the same predicament as the learned gentlemen confronted with “shizzle my nizzle“.

  2. I do not believe in global warming. I do not care about Black Lives Matter. I hope Russia defeats Ukraine in the war!

  3. > has me wondering if the English language has moved on without me

    English language? Here’s a link that will break your brain. Yes its really from the renowned British Broadcasting Corporation, yes its a real news website, and yes its really “English”. Just read the words phonetically, and forget everything about spelling and grammar:

    https://www.bbc.com/pidgin

  4. Well, it’s a subculture, with its own signs, symbols, icons and dialect. You’d expect that from any subgroup like it.

    When I was in my mid-teenage years I had three friends in particular who I hung around with – when I had the time to do that. We invented our own “language” for use only between the four of us. It wasn’t a language so much as a rearrangement and bastardization of English rules and spelling, but it was consistent, concise and easy to learn the rules.

    We used it for a while and then the charm wore off as it began to feel too “dorky.”

    • In lieu of our “dorky” corruption of the English language in the service of talking about super-secret internal monologue discussions between 14 and 15 year olds, one of my buddies and I spoke semi-broken Spanish instead. We had both taken the same year-long Spanish class in middle school, and he was about as fluent as I was. As a result, I can read most common, conversational Spanish – although I have difficulty producing it because it’s a perishable skill and you need to practice to stay sharp.

      So I think it’s less about race and more to do with the fact that social subgroups tend to enjoy creating their own signs, lingo and more, to culturally define themselves as different. Now that Identity Politics is all that matters in the Universe, I expect to see this continue. Someone should train ChatGPT.

    • If you’d spent any time on this blog in the past 10 years, you’d know that philg considers the topic of women making bank off of men his neighborhood. He wrote the 50-state book about it.

  5. I feel sorry for the kids, I hope they don’t get wasted as they grow up, but I fear they will given the actions of their mother — you simply don’t go public like that no matter what. I hope the judge will see her twitter’s and take it into consideration and demand that Chanel gets an education in parenting.

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