Could the elite universities clear their pro-Hamas encampments with Taylor Swift music?

by philg

The U.S. got Manuel Noriega out of the Vatican’s embassy in Panama City by playing Van Halen 24/7. I wonder if administrators at elite universities could clear their “river to the sea” encampments of Hamas/Hezbollah/UNRWA/Palestinian Islamic Jihad supporters via the magic of Taylor Swift. Given that the only thing more expensive, and therefore presumably more sought-after, than a day at an elite university is a day at a Taylor Swift concert (see Long term effects of taking away $5-10,000 from every upper middle class family with a female child?) nobody could complain about a DJ spinning up Ms. Swift’s The Tortured Poets Department on repeat. The schools are mostly shut down so 85 dBA (keep it within OSHA limits) of Taylor Swift 24/7 wouldn’t disturb any classes. Why not just play Taylor Swift until those who are camped out decide that they’d rather listen to something else and, therefore, have to walk away?

Separately, here’s my favorite recent social media post relating to the Ivy league:

This combines the Latinx, Queers, and a drum circle. Who could ask for more?

Lyrics to “Florida!!!”:

You can beat the heat if you beat the charges too
They said I was a cheat, I guess it must be true
And my friends all smell like weed or little babies
And this city reeks of driving myself crazy
Little did you know
Your home’s really only a town you’re just a guest in
So you work your life away
Just to pay for a timeshare down in Destin
Florida is one hell of a drug
Florida, can I use you up?
The hurricane with my name when it came
I got drunk and I dared it to wash me away
Barricaded in the bathroom with a bottle of wine
Well, me and my ghosts, we had a hell of a time
Yes, I’m haunted but I’m feeling just fine
All my girls got their lace and their crimes
And your cheating husband disappeared
Well, no one asks any questions here

(Maybe she is singing about the Redneck Riviera, more properly part of Alabama, than the parts of Florida that most people consider “Florida”? Destin is shown below, straight south from Alabama.)

In case the above is memory-holed as disinformation:

9 thoughts on “Could the elite universities clear their pro-Hamas encampments with Taylor Swift music?”

  1. The FBI tried (unsuccessfully) to clear David Koresh and the Branch Davidians out of their Waco compound by repeatedly playing Nancy Sinatra’s “These Boots Are Made For Walking” and other similar catchy tunes. But that was before Taylor Swift was born.

    • I have played “Drop Kick Me Jesus” by Bobby Bare on the jukebox to clear homeboys out of a pool table in bars in Long Beach and it has worked every time. Listen to it before you dismiss the possibility.

  2. Van Halen 24/7 is still a better option. I’ll endure some discomfort since I live near the campus, but I’m willing to make sacrifices. A night of torrential cold rain might also work—it would at least prompt a retreat to the pre-established defensive positions in the Columbia dorms. The agenda for the ‘Princeton Popular University for Gaza’ resembles a Monty Python sketch. I’m curious about the ‘Water ritual’ scheduled for 6pm.

  3. Could the elite universities clear their pro-Hamas encampments with Taylor Swift music? No!
    Why not just play Taylor Swift until those who are camped out decide that they’d rather listen to something else and, therefore, have to walk away? Playing Taylor Swift would just attract more people. If the song were changed to “Baby Shark” it could work.
    Who could ask for more? Pavel!

  4. better play Rammstein, Sabaton and Barry Sister’s Hava Nagila 24/7. Maybe it will also rally near-Columbia anon

    • A selection of jewish music might work. Or country music. “My ears! They defiled my beautiful ears!”

      Organ music like Bach has been used to drive away the riff-raff, I’m told.

    • Bary Sisters is Jewish music, mostly Yiddish and English. https://youtu.be/P9IymGOG2vE Sabaton has Counter-punch song, about 6 day war in 1967 when Israel defeated coalition of Arab countries that were attacking it and that dwarfed Israel. https://youtu.be/xKOxIcfuzx0.
      Rammstein ends with stein and is sung in foreign language, so it could be considered Jewish by our best and brightest college students with forgiven college loans.

  5. Of course the pro-Hamas protestors are (actually) deplorable, but no one should be tortured like that. If we stoop to barbarism, then the terrorists win.

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