Speakflation

It’s the 25th anniversary of the Islamic jihad that brought down the World Trade Center. The Bureau of Labor Statistics will mark this solemn event by releasing updated CPI statistics. (From state-sponsored PBS: “The consumer price index rose 3.4% last month compared with a year ago, the Labor Department said Friday, the same as in July. But on a monthly basis, inflation quickened, as costs jumped 0.4% from July to August, up from an increase of just 0.1% the previous month.”)

April 2022, an order for a Speakman S-2251-PB shower head at $136:

June 2025, the same shower head for a different bathroom, up to $154:

July 29, 2026, $344:

Helpful hint: Do not allow your anyone to knock out or pull out the plastic water restrictor because the result is a powerful torrent of shower (5 gpm?).

What can explain this level of Speakflation? The Islamic Republic of Iran is buying up all of the brass for use in the weapons that they continue to make because we haven’t disabled their oil and electricity industries? It can’t be a new union agreement in a U.S. factory because the manufacturer’s site says that the fixture is made in China.

Speaking of the Islamic Republic, ChatGPT says that we’re on track to have one of our own:

Approximately 2.5 million Muslims probably immigrated permanently to the United States between September 11, 2001, and mid-2026; a plausible range is 2–3 million. This does not include their U.S.-born children.

Related:

• Wirecutter says that a cheaper and absurdly low-flow (1.75 gph version) Speakman isn’t so great: “none of the streams provided wide enough coverage to feel satisfying” (presumably they did not make the mistake of removing the restrictor)